When we talk about goal settings, we mostly think it’s a grown up thing to do, applying only to adults. Even then, we mostly apply it areas of our work, probably not as much to our personal lives.
But here’s the thing…the simple act of setting goals benefits us in many ways. Namely, we put ourselves on a more focused path, knowing exactly what we need to do.
Goal setting can be very helpful to children’s development as well. As soon as they are able to communicate with us, around the age of three to four, it’s a good time to start them on simple goal setting activities.
How Goal Setting Helps With Child Development
1. It Gives a Sense of Purpose
Having a goal gives all of us a sense of purpose, even for a young child. Yes, they live life in a carefree manner, doing whatever comes to mind at any given moment. Having some direction and something to look forward to achieving enhances their purposefulness.
2. It Builds Self-Esteem
When they are able to achieve the goals they set, it builds their confidence in themselves, thus having a healthy sense of self-esteem and image of themselves.
Having said that, we as parents also need to help them along when at first they don’t succeed. Encourage them to keep trying instead of leaving them to feel defeated if they don’t achieve their goals.
Learning from mistakes and so-called failures along the way is part of life as well.
3. It Builds Perseverance
In working towards achieving their goals, the journey builds them up with perseverance, no matter what goal it is. The important part is for them to learn not to give up. Teach them that it is alright to feel down if things are not going their way, and teach them to pick themselves up again to persevere.
4. It Helps Them Take Initiative
When they set their own goals, there is a sense of ownership of their goals. They will learn to take the initiatives to work towards them, not because they are told to, but because they want to.
What Kind of Goals Can Young Children Set?
Is it really too young for toddlers to set goals? I think not. They are always learning and pacing themselves to do something “right” at that stage. It’s just that these little efforts have not been articulated into goals.
Here are some examples of goals that pre-school children can set for themselves:
- Personal grooming goals like being able to tie own shoe laces, button and unbutton shirts, learning to fold clothes, to be potty trained, learning to brush their teeth, gargling and spitting during the process (saves us from buying safe-to-swallow toothpaste!)
- Learning-based goals like being able to count up to a certain number, knowing their alphabets or being able to read a specific number of words a week, learning to draw certain objects
- Motor skills like being able to eat without spillage on their own, learning to use a spoon/fork or even chopsticks, learning to ride a three-wheeler, learning to wash their plates and utensils
For older children of school age, some examples of goals they can set are:
- Saving X amount of money in a year
- Reading a specified number of books a month or year
- Learn a musical instrument of their choice
- Pick up a sport that interests them
Encourage them to look around for more fun ways and ideas to go about their goal-setting plans.
Make The Journey Fun
To begin, think through how you want to teach your child goal setting. It can be a fun-filled exercise that involves simple goal boards or just making a list of them by writing or drawing on a piece of paper or cardboard. It helps to set the fun tone as if it’s a play project rather than something strict and formal.
Also, every goal should be trackable in terms of the progress. This is where we can help to inject some element of fun for them. To help them track their journey, we can do the following:
- Make a progress chart/drawing and put it on the fridge or a white board
- Cross out or put in check marks when something has been achieved
- Reward the progress with fun and cool stickers
- Reward specific milestones with a treat of ice cream or their favourite snacks
Look up more resources and ideas that you can relate to, and make this exercise engaging and memorable for your child.
What’s More Important Is The Learning Journey
Achieving a goal is good, but what’s also important is the process or journey along the way. It is through the journey that they learn and pick up all these positive traits that build up their character and skills.
So as parents, we need to also help them to enjoy the process and not only focus on the outcome alone. It can turn out to be stressful if all we care about is the result of the goal. Life isn’t all about only achieving success, and that’s part of the learning that goes into it for our children.
Encourage them to have fun along the way and be their cheerleader to celebrate little milestones with them. This is a very important thing to do, for them to learn that we not only celebrate big success, but also small ones.
It’ll be good if we do this together with our children, working on our goals as well, instead of just being a by-stander to watch them. Let them know that you too have goals or resolutions that you want to work towards, and do it hand-in-hand!