Hearing the words “Your baby has Down syndrome” is not something any expecting mother wants to hear.
A thousand questions may be running through your mind at the diagnosis. You’ve seen children with the condition and never expected your own child to be one of them.
As upsetting or even unthinkable as this can be, don’t panic yet.
It’s important to get all the facts straight and even debunk some common misconceptions about Down syndrome before you do anything.
Aside from your doctor, there is a world of information out there for you to tap into to learn more about what this means for you and your baby.
And what’s more, you’re not alone. Here’s what you need to know if your unborn child has Down syndrome.
Understanding the Diagnosis
Down syndrome, also called trisomy 21, is a genetic condition that affects 1 in 1000 babies worldwide.
The mutation happens when a baby has an extra copy of chromosome 21. As a result, the child will be born with certain physical and mental disabilities, and oftentimes even chronic medical conditions.
But every child with Down syndrome is unique. While some may only have very mild symptoms, others may need more support and care.
The condition is usually picked up through prenatal screening or diagnostic tests.
You may have had a combined screening in early pregnancy or a non-invasive prenatal test (NIPT) before getting this diagnosis.
If the results were high risk, your healthcare provider may have recommended a diagnostic test like amniocentesis.
These tests are accurate and can confirm the condition before birth, which allows parents to make any important decisions before the child comes into the world.
Take Time to Process
After the diagnosis, you may feel a mix of emotions: shock, grief, guilt, love, or even numbness.
This is a completely normal reaction to the news that you were given, especially if you are a first-time mother.
Take time to sit with your feelings and truly understand where you are mentally before making an rash decisions.
Speak openly with your partner or trusted friends and family. It is important to take as much time as you need.
You may also find it helpful to talk to a counsellor or therapist trained in prenatal support.
They may help you process certain thoughts and worries that a family member or spouse cannot so easily deal with.
Talk to a Specialist
Now that you have calmed down and allowed yourself to feel your emotions and process the shock, it’s time for some practical action.
Despite all the information that your doctor has given you, you may want to start doing your own research. This is good.
Every new parent needs to have this kind of initiative. But be careful where you get your info from.
The internet, while a convenient resource, is often full of misinformation and outright conspiracy theories.
Therefore, ask your midwife or obstetrician to refer you to a genetics counsellor or specialist.
They can walk you through the diagnosis, answer questions about what to expect, and help you explore your options.
Just a gentle reminder, they won’t tell you what to do.
The job of a medical professional is to give you clear, balanced information so you can make the right choice for you and your family.
Learn About Life With Down Syndrome
Sometimes even with all the technical and medical info, you may still be on the fence about what to do next.
In fact, knowing too many facts can even lead to a sort of analysis paralysis. The next best thing to do is to take a step back from all the research.
Instead of relying on the mind to make decisions, perhaps it’s time to look at things with the heart.
Therefore, it’s helpful to actually learn first what life can look like for a child with Down syndrome. Sometimes the media and societal misconceptions and taboos make it seem like the condition is much worse than it is.
If you go on Reddit or on any of the social media sites specifically catered to Singapore families with DS children, you’ll get to see the truth and not inflated rumors.
Look for stories from real families: social media, blogs, and Down syndrome organisations often share personal experiences that offer hope and perspective.
For instance, many families say the diagnosis felt scary at first, but their child brought joy, strength, and new purpose to their lives.
Moreover, you may also find that children with Down syndrome can go to school, play sports, learn to read, and form strong relationships.
Yes, there are challenges; children with Down syndrome often have developmental delays and medical concerns.
But with early support, many children grow up to live full and happy lives.
Know Your Options
So you’ve done your research, looked at the facts, and even spoken to families who are raising Down syndrome babies and children.
At this point, you have all you need to take the next steps in your pregnancy.
But what exactly are those steps? After a prenatal diagnosis, you may be thinking about whether to continue the pregnancy.
This is a deeply personal decision, and one no one can make for you.
Some parents choose to continue and prepare for life with a Down syndrome baby (and all the challenges that may come with it). Others may consider termination, depending on their personal beliefs and circumstances.
There is no right or wrong choice, only what feels right for you at this moment and time in your life.
If abortion or raising the child goes against the plans you have for a family, there is always a third option: adoption.
If you feel like there is no way that you can raise your Down syndrome child, the social system will find a home that will love and care for them.
Moving Forward
As you go through the ups and downs of the decision-making process, know that you don’t have to face this alone.
There are wonderful charities and groups that support families affected by Down syndrome.
Including mothers who are currently expecting a child with the condition. Here are some of the organisations that you can reach out to:
- Down’s Syndrome Association (UK)
- Positive About Down Syndrome (PADS)
- Antenatal Results and Choices (ARC)
These organisations offer guidance, connect you with other parents, and provide emotional support as you
Whatever path you take, be gentle with yourself.
This may not be an easy journey, but it’s not one you have to walk alone.
If you choose to continue the pregnancy, your healthcare team will help monitor your baby’s development and plan for any extra care they might need at birth.
If you decide otherwise, compassionate support is available to help you through the process.
Remember, you are still the best parent for your baby, whatever happens next. Love, care, and understanding begin with you.
Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as medical advice from Mamahood. For any health-related concerns, it is advisable to consult with a qualified healthcare professional or medical practitioner.
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